SUNDAY SUNDAY SUNDAY ONE NIGHT ONLY

A good friend of mine, Jason (the same Jason who brought you the formatting/whatnot for this nugget of joy) have been in the habit of calling each other whenever we see a goofy/hokey message on the marquee of a church sign. We are both considered experts in this emerging field, and receive numerous calls per week from seekers attempting to spit out a marquee we haven’t seen yet.

Amateurs often dabble in the common, low-grade messages, such as “God accepts knee mail”, or “Give the devil an inch and he’ll become your ruler”, while Jason and I have transcended the common and really captured the soul of the marquee message. When we see a new, exciting one, we often report to each other what it says. Let’s review some of the ones that are in the hall of fame (note: I’m going to use www.churchsigngenerator.com to display my favorites. None of these were made up, and have all been seen by Jason or I.)

This is my personal all-time favorite. I don’t think any interpretation is needed here, this sign is bad enough to stand on its own.

Wow. This is a close second-place runner-up. The implications of this sign are certainly wide-reaching, I mean, how did this sign know that I taught English to abunch of immigrants living in the Duluth area? Holy crap, I better repent immediately.

A favorite of Mr. Dean (who also first saw this one.) I’m not certain that is the proper verse reference, but it was some verse talking about how thieves will not inherit the Kingdom of God (which 1 Cor. 6:10 does.) This one is certainly more acceptable than the ones above, but it also is tempting the thieves to come back.

Ignoring the obvious question on this one, that is, “which man is ‘this man’?”, this marquee gets special props from me for its use of the rarely used verb, spake. Additional accolades for this one, as it was seen no more than 5 miles from where one Mr. Adam J. Walker used to live, in Cleveland, TN.

So there’s your Marquee Message Round-up. The best of the best. As far as a funny link goes, let’s have a looksie at my stash. Ahh, here we go, Patently Silly. This guy has a habit of searching the library of patents that have been submitted/filed, finds the craziest/funniest/etc ones, and writes a blurb about them. Very funny stuff, I check it often.